Foaas Client

Build Status Code Climate

A client for FOAAS.

API Version

Version 0.1.8 of the FOAAS API is supported.

Usage

Basic Example

require 'foaas-client'

fuck = Foaas::Client.new
fuck.off('Bob', 'Alice')

i18n

fuck.off('Bob', 'Alice', i18n: :es)
#=> { 'message': 'Vete a la mierda, Bob.', 'subtitle': '-Alice' }

Response Types

fuck.off('Bob', 'Alice', :html)
#=> '<html>...</html>'

fuck.off('Bob', 'Alice', :json)
#=> '{ "message": "Fuck off, Bob.", "subtitle": "- Alice" }'

fuck.off('Bob', 'Alice', :jsonp)
#=> 'fuck && fuck({ "message": "Fuck off, Bob.", "subtitle": "- Alice" });'

fuck.off('Bob', 'Alice', :text)
#=> 'Fuck off, Bob. - Alice'

fuck.off('Bob', 'Alice', :xml)
#=> '<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>...'

Shoutcloud

fuck.off('Bob', 'Alice', shoutcloud: true)
#=> { 'message': 'FUCK OFF, BOB', 'subtitle': '- ALICE' }

Methods

Awesome

fuck.awesome('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'This is Fucking Awesome.', subtitle => '- Alice' }

Ballmer

fuck.ballmer('Bob', 'Alice', 'Clara')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fucking Bob is a fucking pussy. I'm going to fucking bury that guy, I have done it before, and I will do it again. I'm going to fucking kill Alice.', 'subtitle' => '- Clara' }

Because

fuck.because('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Why? Because Fuck you, that\'s why.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Bucket

fuck.bucket('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Please choke on a bucket of cocks.', 'subtitle' => '-Alice' }

Bus

fuck.bus('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Christ on a bendy-bus, Bob, don\'t be such a fucking faff-arse', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Bye

fuck.bye('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fuckity bye!', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Can I use?

fuck.caniuse('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Can you use Bob? Fuck no!', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Chainsaw

fuck.chainsaw('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fuck me gently with a chainsaw, Bob. Do I look like Mother Teresa?', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Cool

fuck.cool('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Cool story, Bro', '- Alice' }

Dalton

fuck.dalton('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'msessage' => 'Bob: A fucking problem solving super-hero', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Diabetes

fuck.diabetes('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'I\'d love to stop and chat to you but I\'d rather have type 2 diabetes.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Donut

fuck.donut('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Bob, go and take a flying fuck at a rolling donut.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Do something

fuck.dosomething('Write', 'Code', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => ' 'Write the fucking code!', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Everyone

fuck.everyone('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Everyone can go and fuck off.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Everything

fuck.everything('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fuck everything.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Family

fuck.family('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fuck you, your whole family, your pets, and your feces', 'subtitle' => '- Alice'}

Fascinating

fuck.fascinating('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fascinating story, in what chapter do you shut the fuck up?', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Field

fuck.field('Alice', 'Bob', 'Clara')
#=> { 'message' => 'And Alice said on to Bob, "Verily, cast thine eyes upon the field in which I grow my fucks", and Bobgave witness onto the field, and saw that it was barren.', 'subtitle' => '- Clara' }

Flying

fuck.flying('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'I don\'t give a flying fuck.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

#### King

```ruby
fuck.king('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Oh fuck off, just really fuck off you total dickface. Christ Bob, you are fucking thick.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Life

fuck.life('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fuck my life.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Linus

fuck.linus('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Bob, there aren't enough swear-words in the English language, so now I'll have to call you perkeleen vittupää just to express my disgust and frustration with this crap.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Madison

fuck.madison('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'What you\'ve said is one of the most insantely idiotic things I have ever heard, Bob. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points Bob, and may God have mercy on your soul.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Nugget

fuck.nugget('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { ''Well Bob, aren\'t you a shining example of a rancid fuck-nugget.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Off

fuck.off('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fuck off, Bob.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Operations

Note: This is not an "insult" method, it returns the avialble "insult" operations. Additionally, this method only returns JSON.

fuck.operations()
#=> [ { 'name' => 'Ballmer', 'url' => '/ballmer/:name/:company/:from', 'fields' => [ { 'name' => 'Name', 'field' => 'name' }, { 'name' => 'Company', 'field' => 'company' }, { 'name' => 'From', 'field' => 'field'} ] }, ...]

Outside

fuck.outside('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Bob, why don\'t you go outside and play hide-and-go-fuck-yourself?', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Pink

fuck.pink('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Well, Fuck me pink.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Retard

fuck.retard('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'You Fucktard!', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Shakespeare

fuck.shakespeare('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Thou clay-brained guts, thou knotty-pated fool, thou whoreson obscene greasy tallow-catch!', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Shutup

fuck.shutup('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'messasge' => 'Bob, shut the fuck up.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Thanks

fuck.thanks('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fuck you very much', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

That

fuck.that('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fuck that', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Thing

fuck.thing('it', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fuck it.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

This

fuck.this('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fuck this.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Tucker

fuck.tucker('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Come the fuck in or fuck the fuck off.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Thumbs

fuck.thumbs('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Who has two thumbs and doesn't give a fuck? Alice.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Version

Note: This is not an "insult" method, it returns the version of the service.

fuck.version()
#=> { 'message' => '0.1.0', 'subtitle' => 'FOAAS' }

What

fuck.what('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'What the fuck?!', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Xmas

fuck.xmas('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Merry Fucking Christmsa, Bob', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Yoda

fuck.yoda('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fuck off, you must, Bob', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

You

fuck.you('Bob', 'Alice')
#=> { 'message' => 'Fuck you, Bob.', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }

Zayn

fuck.zayn('Alice')
#=> { 'message' => ''Ask me if I give a motherfuck ?!!', 'subtitle' => '- Alice' }